2019 Life Lessons


2019 was a hard year but sis got through it! Without strong faith, you will never see the light that awaits for you at the end of the tunnel so here I am, holding onto faith knowing that God will never put me through things I cannot overcome. I want to focus on how grateful I am to see another year, to be breathing and to be typing this post in this very moment! To even think we're entering an entire new decade is crazy. I hope this new year will bring us all love, prosperity and success.

What four important lessons did I learn this year?

1) You Either Learn to Love Your Own Company or Hate Your Loneliness

I've spent so long feeling sad about how lonely I am when instead, I could have invested this energy into learning to love my own company. Don’t get me wrong, being isolated for a long period of time isn’t healthy at all but you need to swallow your pity and just get on with it. Without solitude, I wouldn’t have found clarity in my life and developed new ideas/goals.  I wrote down my mission statement and it truly aligns with who I am and what I am meant to do.

Now that I know what I’m trying to achieve, there are so many reasons why I should enjoy my own company because I have more time to focus on my blog, work on my goals and fulfil my purpose in life. Rather than depending on people to do things with, I found the confidence to do it alone and I love it! I took myself out for dinner and I watched two films at the cinema alone - talk about progress eh? A solo trip abroad is definitely on my bucket list too.

I kept affirming that I’ll manifest new friendships into my life, towards the end of this year I did! I still haven’t found "my people" but I know one day I will. I just need to keep believing I’ll meet them. In 2020, I am attracting like-minded people who are ambitious, supportive and encourage me to be better.

2) When the Time is Right You'll Find Someone

”Where’s your man?”. I've had the same response for 5 years now. I-don't-know.

I guess this is the period you date, you have fun and you experiment, even my uncle pointed out "YoU shOuLD bE dAtINGg nOW". Patience is a virtue and I’ve always said no company is better than bad company. Sometimes I feel like I'm missing out, I haven't experienced the excitement of talking to someone new for 4/5 years. It'd be nice to spend time with someone who is "romantically interested" in me but you know, we move. My friends tell me you're not getting yourself out there and I guess it's kinda true. I barely went out this year so how can I expect to meet anyone? In 2020, I'm going to make more of an effort to go out more and enjoy the last few months of being a student.

I hate wasting time which means I would hate to waste my precious time on someone who doesn’t truly value me. Self love hasn’t been my strongest point but I believe that I am worthy of being loved. Even if I'm not the prettiest girl in the world and I have insecurities about myself (don't we all) that I can't change, this doesn't mean I am any less worthy of finding someone who will accept and love me for who I am. Only God knows how long it'll be before that "special someone" comes along but I know it'll be worth the wait. In the mean time, I'll enjoy the single life.

3) If You have Strong Faith, Good Things will Happen

The first few months of this year was the lowest I have ever been. In "You Got Egsma" and "My Mental Health and University I spoke about my mental and physical health being in a really bad state. I am so grateful that my overall health has improved during this year. I prayed, repeated affirmations, listened to my self-love playlists, cried a lot and hoped for a breakthrough and it occurred.

My face is better (thank God for the Abido cream!!) but I can't exactly say the same for my hands, neck and arms. The Abido cream acts like a miracle cream, it relieves the symptoms really well but it doesn't stop the eczema from coming back. One of the ingredients is a steroid so I need to reduce how often I use it because I'm quite dependent on it. My food sensitivities are kinda frustrating even though I am now more aware of my triggers, it seems like I get random flare ups. I'm praying in 2020 I will find a cure so I can live normal life and eat whatever I want. In February, I will be seeing my dermatologist again (it's been about 8 months to get the correct appointment but let me not even start-). I really hope this will be the start of my healing journey.

4) Without a plan, your dream is merely just a DREAM

When I remind myself of my vision and purpose in life, I ask myself, do I have a clear defined plan that will allow me to get there and to be honest the answer is no. You can dream all you want but without action your dream is just a dream. Without a plan, again your dream is just a dream. Often we need to take a step back and ask ourselves whether our current actions is aligning with our vision. You can't keep doing what you've always done because the result will be the same. I'm tired of stagnating, in 2020 I am going to fulfil what I am capable of.

I've written my 2020 goals with actionable steps, I reviewed them every morning just to remind myself what I'm working towards. Next year we're making solid plans and executing them! When I set goals in the past they were too generic. There wasn't a time frame or a way to measure success, this prevented me from achieving them. Each month, I am planning to set specific goals that will get me closer to my yearly goal.

2019 has increased my strength. I am entering 2020 with an open heart, courageousness and ambition. With God anything is possible! I won't anticipate what is to come, instead I will live and enjoy the present moment.

"2020 Will Be My Year" | Guest Post by Jeffna

But will it?

As the new year’s approaching, everyone’s running around screaming that 2020 will be their year of success, claiming it will be different from previous years and how they plan to do things differently. One thing I’ve learnt, particularly during this year is that you can talk about all the things you hope to do but all that talk will be in vain if your actions don’t match your words. You know that phrase ‘actions speak louder than words’? That applies to so many things in life including your goals and plans. We can all say that we’ll do this, that and the other but it’s all really down to what we do behind closed doors; the amount of time we dedicate to the goal we plan or hope to achieve.

I won’t act like it’s easy to work towards your goals though, especially when life throws so many obstacles at you, fear and self-doubt grips you and makes you think that you’re incapable of fulfilling your goals or makes you downplay your achievements. However, making small progress daily can slowly bring you closer to achieving your goals without feeling overwhelmed and losing all motivation.

This year, I had to accept that I was a professional procrastinator (PP for short) who’d delay things until the last minute. Fortunately for me, although I often procrastinate, I am well-organized so this helps me to get things completed before it’s too late to. As the year went by, I had to accept and challenge this flaw of mine and have made every effort to use more of my day to do more productive things. I managed to achieve all but one of my 2019 goals (yay me) but I’m still slowly detaching from my dear friend procrastination who’s the biggest dream killer that exists- i’ll explain how I’ve managed to do so.

The five tips listed below are effective measures which have increased my daily productivity throughout 2019:

  1. Having a personal planner/ yearly planner – I have purchased a yearly planner for the past three years and honestly, this is one thing that keeps me in order. I use this to plan what I hope to do every day , to note down my weekly spend and budgets and obviously, to keep note of any upcoming meetings or link ups during the month. I recently purchased one from Amazon which allows you to break down your goals into smaller goals to make it less overwhelming: https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B07WFQ9XCW/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o00_s01?ie=UTF8&psc=
  2. Having a notepad – Alongside having a planner, a notepad is also very helpful for noting down your goals for the year, your achievements and any other ideas you have for the year. This can help with reflecting on how close you are to achieving your goals and remaining focused.
  3. Monitoring your screen time/ how long you spend on social media– I started doing this from last month and noticed that when I’m not busy, my time is usually spent on social media such as Youtube and Twitter (my guilty pleasures). To reduce the amount of time I spend on such platforms, I have set myself a time limit of 6-8 hours a day depending on the day of the week to increase productivity and to encourage myself to fill up my free time with more wholesome activities e.g: Meditating on the Bible, reading a book or cooking.
  4.  Finding new hobbies ^
  5. Asking for God’s help – As I was completing my final year of uni this year, I found it very difficult to stay motivated to complete important tasks at times. However, God continually used the people around me and his word to remind me that so long as I trust in him, ask for his help and don’t rely on my strength alone, I can overcome anything. By God’s grace, I graduated with an upper second class and achieved a first for my dissertation and for me, this was only possible with his help. In the same way, I’ve noticed that by asking God to help me manage my time more effectively, there’s been an improvement and I can do this with ease/ Proverbs 3:5-7. 
Overall, my 2019 has been an amazing one, full of growth and many life memories. I’m going nto 2020 with the plan of being more productive in everything I do and I hope you all manage to do this also. I wish you all a productive and joyful new year.

With love,

Jeffna x


Twitter: https://twitter.com/jkm_xo Insta:https://www.instagram.com/jeffs_corner1/ Personal blog: https://jeffscornerblog.wordpress.com/

Applaud Yourself

We always beat ourselves up when we make mistakes, yet we rarely give ourselves praise for the good things we do. You have so many things to be proud of; getting into uni, making it into third year, finding a job, being offered an interview, being a good friend etc. The list is endless so never forget about the great things you are doing or have done.

Be Grateful

“You attract what you think about” is not an understatement. It’s important to focus on what’s already present in our lives rather than what we lack. How can we expect to receive more if we fail to acknowledge everything we should be grateful for?